


out of the black into the blue

by intoxicatelou



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben Solo Lives, Canon Divergence, F/M, Fix-It, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Healing, Mutual Pining, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, broken ankle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:15:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24192688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/intoxicatelou/pseuds/intoxicatelou
Summary: It isn’t even Rey’s idea that they share quarters. Really, when it comes down to it, she doesn’t have much of a choice.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Finn, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 3
Kudos: 13
Collections: Hurt Comfort Exchange 2020





	out of the black into the blue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Isilloth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Isilloth/gifts).



> title is a lyric from the song "get free" by lana del rey

It isn’t even Rey’s idea that they share quarters. Really, when it comes down to it, she doesn’t have much of a choice. 

“I don’t trust him.” Poe says, almost immediately once they get Ben to the infirmary. 

“He’s different, I swear.” Rey protests, “He’s not Kylo Ren anymore.” 

“You keep saying that,” Poe snaps, his voice sharp “but it’s going to take a whole lot more than just calling him _Ben_ to convince the rest of us.” 

A group of engineers glance their way as they walk past where the three of them huddle outside the infirmary and Poe gives them a tight smile. Finn at least has the decency to look apologetic on his behalf. 

“We really should be having this conversation in Leia’s office,” Poe grumbles, “This place is a damn rumor mill. Everyone’s trying to figure out why I’ve allowed _Kylo Ren_ refuge on a resistance base he literally tried blowing out of the galaxy a few weeks ago.” He pauses, dead-pan. “You know, a couple of the pilots think you’re pregnant. That you and Ren had some secret force baby after defeating Palpatine.” 

“You’re not serious, Poe.” Finn says, his eyes widening. Rey just blushes in response, the idea of bringing a child into this world with Ben warming her cheeks involuntarily. 

She isn’t sure how so much could change in so little. She hated him once, she was sure of it. And now, in the same alcove of her heart she can feel nothing but light, bright and blue to touch. 

“Someone apparently overheard Rey saying _a part of him lives inside me_. ” Poe says, shrugging his shoulders, staring pointedly at Rey. 

“I was talking to Rose earlier about how the force-healing works inside our bond!” Rey stammers, her blush deepening. She peeks into the infirmary, looking at where Ben stirs gently, still sleeping. Their entire bond was radiating in a way Rey had never felt before, even if he’d given up almost all of his life force to save her.

Rey sighs, “I know we should be talking in Leia’s office, it’s just that I can’t be away from him right now, Poe. I’m sorry, I don’t know how to explain it but...”

“The Force,” Poe sighs, running a hand over his face and Rey can hear the weariness, the fatigue of everything they’ve been through in the last couple days clear in the strain of his voice. “Okay, look I can’t even begin to understand whatever’s going on between the both of you but while Ren is on resistance grounds, he’s your responsibility. I don’t want him to as much as sneeze without supervision.”

“ _Ben_ is not a prisoner _—_ “

“You said it yourself, you can’t be away from him right now. So don’t.” Poe crosses his arms, “From now on, you’re on surveillance duty. Keep track of him and let Finn and I know of any suspicious activity.” 

“Suspicious activity?” Rey frowns, “There’s no First Order anymore and Palpatine is dead. I made sure of it. ”

“It’s not about the First Order!” Finn exclaims, a look of genuine worry in his eyes. “Sorry Rey, but I have to agree with Poe on this one. Kylo - _Ben_ is dangerous. The kind of dark conditioning he went through with Snoke, I mean, that stuff doesn’t just disappear overnight.” 

Rey knows that they’re just trying to help but she can’t help but feel a flare of anger. 

“Ben saved my life. Doesn’t that mean anything?” Rey asks, her jaw tight. 

“It does,” Poe says, his eyes hard, “It’s the only reason he’s in the infirmary and not the morgue.” 

“ _Poe_ ,” Finn admonishes, but Rey doesn’t have to use the force to know that some part of him agrees. 

“It’s fine,” Rey sighs, biting her tongue but walking past the both of them to sit next to Ben in the infirmary. 

_Dangerous,_ she tries to think, watching the shallow rise of his chest. 

She remembers the time she accidentally force bonded with him while he was asleep in his quarters. Even then, he looked like he was fighting some invisible dark voice the way he rolled around restless, afraid. She watched him sleep for a moment before severing the connection, because even though she couldn’t see the shadow of what tormented him on the inside, she could still feel the shape of its feral, unstable energy. 

They weren’t wrong. He had been dangerous once, and Rey knew about that side of Ben best of all. But right now, _dangerous_ is the last word she’d use to describe him, staring at his bruised eye, the pale blue of his lips.

She takes his hand, shivering at how cold he is, feeling the shard of the emptiness inside him. His life was barely floating inside him, and no wonder their bond was surging — it was like a taut string about to break. 

Rey doesn’t hesitate when she reaches for their bond in her mind, flooding it with warmth. 

_You aren’t dangerous,_ she thinks instead and channels all the other words he feels like to her now _—_ _Beautiful, Free, Light. Light. Light._

 _Rey,_ she hears him echo weakly in her skull as their bond swells, live-wire. _Rey, you can’t heal me again._

 _Ben, please,_ she thinks, pushing forward anyway, _let me_ —

“Rey, what are you doing, hey —” Somewhere in the background, Rey hears Finn’s panicked voice as the temperature in the room drops. Rey is distantly aware she’s floating now, Ben’s bed rattling. 

_Rey!_ She can hear Ben’s scream, though it’s barely audible over the rush of blood in her ears. _Stop, you’ll upset the balance, you’ll kill yourself all over again, Rey, please, you’re too weak_ — His panic ebbs like smoke in her mind, making her vision dizzy. 

But she’s so _close_ , she can feel the light wrapping itself around her skull, the veil between them snapping white hot as she lets one last burst of energy pulse into the place where their fingers intertwine. 

_Be with me,_ Rey prays and her eyes fly open, wet with sweat or tears she can’t tell, not that it matters because _it worked_ — Ben is squeezing her palm, blinking back. 

“Rey,” She hears him whisper, voice hoarse but still so warm, so new, so _Ben._

And then everything goes black. 

+

She wakes up in her quarters. Or sorry, _their_ quarters because there’s another twin cot pushed to the other side of the wall, not that there’s much room to begin with. 

Ben isn’t sitting there but she can feel him and sure enough, she’s barely had time to sit up before he’s bursting through the fresher door. 

“Rey,” He says again, this time a bit stronger, louder, and she realizes there was still blood drying on his black shirt, blood that she’s sure wasn’t his to begin with. She touches the new bandage on her head, curious. 

“After you woke me up, you fell over and hit your head, opening up your stitches,” Ben says, all business, but she still isn’t used to this, his eyes looking at her as if she’s someone to be taken care of.

“Did I die again?” she asks, quirking an eyebrow at him and Ben _laughs._

Rey feels her chest tighten at the sound and she _definitely_ isn't used to that either. 

“Almost,” Ben says, honest. “But only because I used our bond to push back against the last bit of your life force instead of letting myself heal completely.” 

“Oh,” Rey says, as she notices the bandages on his left ankle and the slight limp as he walks to sit at the edge of her bed. 

“You’d do the same for me,” Ben shrugs with a knowing grin, and Rey realizes he’d done exactly what she’d done for him in a panic on Exegol. “Besides, a broken ankle isn’t too bad when you can just use the force to float whenever you want.” 

Rey laughs at that, unable to stop the noise from bubbling up inside her especially when Ben levitates a few inches off her bed just to prove his point. 

“You’re right,” she says with a smile, “So I was right, it worked?”

“Somehow yes,” Ben says, and he sounds amazed. Rey can’t help it, she is too. “We’re a dyad in the force, Rey. Our bond is rare and impossibly powerful in ways that I’m only just beginning to understand.”

“I know, I feel it too,” Rey responds, and when Ben’s hand reaches for her she doesn’t hesitate to tangle their fingers together, softly gasping at the almost tangible electricity of their connection."

“Rey, we have to be careful. What happened today was an exception. I wasn’t supposed to survive Exegol —”

“Don’t say that, Ben,” Rey interrupts, her voice raw. “Please, you’re here now —”

“I know, _I know_ ,” Ben says, his thumb rubbing gentle circles into her skin, “But Rey you have to understand, I had a vision of everything that happened on Exegol. Leia — “ Ben pauses, takes a shaky breath and Rey leans closer to him, her other hand sliding up to rest on his shoulder to comfort him, “ _my mother_ showed me the end of her path, and it was me, Rey. I had to die in order for her to move on.” 

“You did die,” Rey says, though the sentence sits numb on her tongue. “I heard your heartbeat stop, I felt our bond start to freeze.” 

“I know, I did too. You were barely breathing when I found you, Rey,” Ben’s voice doesn’t waver, but Rey can imagine the anguish, not only because she’d almost lost him, but because somehow, she has memories of her death, though they aren’t her own. “But I always knew that’s where I would find you and what I would have to do. I just wasn’t sure if I would be strong enough to do it.” 

He’s quiet after that, and Rey knows this is a thread of a conversation that would take much longer than tonight to unravel. 

“I know I don’t know about everything, but you were strong enough, Ben. _You saved me_.” Rey says, earnest, “twice actually.” 

Ben blinks before giving her a half smile. “I was less sure the second time around. You were asleep for eleven hours. ” 

Rey’s eyes widen, “ _Eleven hours?_ ” She genuinely can’t remember the last time she slept that long, even if the nights were getting longer where they were. “Kriff, I definitely missed dinner didn’t I?” 

As if on cue, her stomach decides just that moment to rumble noticeably. 

Ben laughs again, “It’s okay, your friend Rose saved you a tray in the conservator.” 

Rey asks, little shocked. “Wait, you had dinner with Rose?” 

“No, but we did talk a little. She was kind enough to bring me some food from the canteen while I was sitting with you,” Ben says, “Not that I was very hungry.” 

“Are you hungry now?” Rey asks, cringing a little at how eager she sounded, “Sorry. Just. Would you like to have dinner with me? I bet there’s enough for two.”

Ben nods and between the both of them, they hardly have to get up to levitate the tray and extra utensils from the cupboard to the bed. They split everything pretty evenly — bread, thick soup, some sort of purple vegetable side. There’s also a red fruit dish for desert, just sweet and tart enough that has Rey moaning around her spoon.

“What? It’s really good,” Rey says, when she catches Ben staring at her. “Do you want some?”

“No,” Ben says, shaking his head and looking away quickly. “You can have the rest of it.” 

“Oh,” If she didn’t know any better, Rey would think he sounded...shy? “Thanks.” 

They finish eating in companionable silence, and then end up staying up making small talk about day to day life on the base and it’s not soon after that Ben yawns, abruptly in the middle of Rey’s explanation about Ajan Kloss’s circadian seasonal pattern. 

“Sorry,” Ben says, sheepish. 

“No, I’m sorry!” Rey feels a little guilty for keeping him up with her rambling, forgetting that she was the only one running on an eleven hour power nap. “Honestly, we both should probably get some sleep.” 

Ben nods, standing up on his good leg to limp over to his bed. Rey almost doesn’t expect him to fit considering he’s built like a tree but he does. And then he’s there, turning to his side, giving her another one of those smiles that she has no idea what to do with. 

“Good night, Rey,” Ben whispers. 

“Good night, Ben.” Rey whispers, before turning on her back, her face warm as she stares at the ceiling, willing herself to sleep. 

  
  



End file.
